Film: Hollywood Racism
hollywoodschwitz
hollywoodschwitz
“THE BRITISH ARE COMING”
Too fucking right, and we’re better actors too. Which explains why we’re wiping American names off of casting calls throughout Hollywood. But this time round I doubt very much that America has even noticed the British invasion. In fact, have you? I only began to notice it recently myself.
It ‘began’ with Batman Begins. I’m a huge fan of Batman, I’m also a fan of Christopher Nolan, the British director responsible for revamping the franchise. Knowing that most of the scenes set in Gotham were actually shot in Bedfordshire, I couldn’t help notice that Wayne Manor too was quite clearly set in the English countryside. And that Batman himself was Welsh. And that Commissioner Gordon was from London. And his boss does voice overs for British television. And that a good 70% of the cast in fact originated from the British Isles. Only the fucking butler kept his accent. Unless you count Liam Neeson, but no one can really tell if he’s trying to do an accent or not anymore.
I found it amusing at first, but things have got ridiculous now. Having watched Kick Ass last week, it suddenly occurred to me how racist Hollywood, or at least the viewing public has become. Kick Ass, a film directed by a Brit, whose screenplay was adapted by Brits, whose little-known star was British and who’s entire cast was littered with British actors including Mark Strong (the film’s main villain) and even Dexter Fletcher from Press Gang and Game’s Master.
What gives? Why so many Brits? Even Hugh Laurie from Blackadder is at it. It turns out when he gave his first interviews in Yankland most people’s response was “why is he doing that stupid English accent?”. Yes, why Hugh – what’s with the stupid accent?
House isn’t the only series to source its stars from our lush green turf – logic-defying atrocity FlashForward hosts an (un)impressive cast lead by mostly British actors, where only the villians and people with ambiguous morality are allowed to retain their native accents.
And this is point I’m driving at – hooray for British actors making it big. Pat on the fucking back. But why are you pretending to be American?
Is it because Yanks won’t comprehend your impossibly jumbled accent?
Can’t be as everyone seems to understand that cockney wankstain Russell Brand.
Is it because the role requires you to be American?
Possibly. I can accept roles like Batman have always been American and always will be. Batman is American.
Is it because Hollywood is racist and doesn’t think the viewing public would be able to handle a British hero?
Yep, pretty much.
Films Sorry, movies such as Wanted, starring Scotland’s James McAvoy depict a band of international super-assassins brought together to direct fate to serve the greater good of humanity. Directed by Timur Bekmambetov, born in the former Soviet Union, this could easily have had an international cast portraying international characters, but instead, the lead character (a Brit) is given an American accent and the only actor to portray a ‘foreigner’ (a Russian) is a quirky loser who ends up dying early anyway.
Australian’s aren’t exactly immune either, with the likes of Russell Crowe, Nicole Kidman, Mel Gibson, Eric Bana, ‘Huge Ackman’, and Naomi Watts all having to ‘fake it’ as Yanks in order to bag the juicy roles. Terminator Salvation, one of the biggest films of last summer starred a Welshman as John Connor, a Russian as his father, an Ozzie as their assassin and an Englishwoman as his creator. These were the 5 leading roles, all dished out to non-Americans, all faking American accents.
It’s easy to argue the toss with ‘this role requires an American’ or ‘this film is made in America so you gadda be ‘Merican’, but if all the talent it being outsourced to Johnny Foreigners like us Brits or even the Ozzies, and in today’s global society where immigration and international travel are almost too easy and the internet connects everyone to just about everyone, it seems bizarre that there aren’t more actors using their native accents. Especially when many of them are shit at putting on an accent. The only reason I can see is plain and simple racism.
For example, Daniel Craig in Tomb Raider. I mean, Lara Croft is ENGLISH (played by an American). Why could they not have cast Daniel Craig, her acquaintance, as a fellow Brit? Daniel Craig’s accent was SHIT. IT WAS LUDICROUS.
I predict: The migrating workforce of actors shifting to the States will soon cause a backlash as a sea of American actors, all living off income support, bankrupt the social care system causing the country’s economy to collapse. Meanwhile the vacuum created by local talent fleeing Britain to seek fame and fortune in the States creates a welcome platform for swarms of Dick Van Dyke style mockneys flood in and take over British television – taking over everything from Bid Up TV to BBC3. Imagine that, the entire cast of ‘Coming of Age’ being replaced by Cockerny Chimnay Sweeps. Might be a good thing. Actually, would anyone notice?
KS
